How to work with grasping - in the moment
Whilst theory can be helpful, the beauty of these teachings is that they are meant to be experiential - we work with them in the moment. This is how I practice with the energy of grasping; some of you have shared with me that this is similar to the mindfulness practice ‘surfing the urge’ which is often shared by psychologists or therapists.
Pause and notice
Physically stop what you are doing and notice how the grasping is showing up; what are the sensations in the body (a contraction, a ‘pull’ towards?), the emotion (urgency, desire), the thoughts (“I need this! Right now!”)?
Offer grounding/space
If the feeling is particularly intense it can be helpful to feel the ground beneath the feet/the seat beneath the body, and you can even cast a wide open gaze. Here, we’re increasing the size of the container that can hold the difficult sensations.
Drop into the body and get curious
Where exactly does this feeling manifest in the body - where are its edges? Are there areas that feel more dense, others more spacious? Is its texture fixed or changing?
Allow the feelings to pass through
As with anything, feelings arise, spend some time, and pass through. We can reduce any resistance to this process by gently saying ‘allowing allowing’ to ourselves. We allow ourselves to ‘burn through’ the sense of craving without needing to react.
Feel the sense of freedom and enjoy
Notice the feeling of freedom when the feeling passes. You can celebrate also the freedom from not having to act on every desire or urge.
Offer self-compassion for the times we slip
It’s normal (and expected) to have setbacks - for those moments we offer ourselves a lot of understanding, and know that the conditions this time meant we were unable to act in a different way. There are no mistakes, only learning opportunities and we can come back to the intention of caring for ourselves by beginning in this moment.
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